Wednesday, September 25, 2013
Do you ever get it? That feeling that you should be doing something else, besides quilting. I'm not talking about the endless mountains of laundry, or the dusting and vacuuming. Heck, I think we all know those things will still be there waiting for us when we are ready to take a stitching break.
I'm talking about that tiny little voice in the back of your mind that calculates how many yards of fabric that tank of gas could have bought. Or the coupons that you wish you could use at the fabric store but they are clearly for cereal only. Sigh.
Does it bother anyone besides me, when the quilting gurus say...buy the best thread you can afford. Well I could afford silk thread if my kids could skip groceries for a week. Duh! It's all about choices.
I'm not simply feeling guilty about the "cost" of quilting but the time as well. How do we balance this insatiable love of fabric and thread against time spent with those who need us. My kitty is very good about letting me know when it's time to take a break and play with her. Sometimes, I look down and wonder if the dogs napping at my feet are dreaming about me throwing balls for them to fetch.
Oh and those little humans that live with me. Okay, they're not so little anymore, they are all actually taller than me now. Ugh. When did that happen? They know how much I love this little hobby of mine. They are fairly understanding, unless it involves an actual trip to the quilt shop that they must endure. I know I spend more time with my kids than most parents get to, but sometimes I wonder what they think when they see me sitting on the floor basting another quilt!
I hope they see a momma who is totally devoted to them AND who is creatively fulfilled.
Am I balancing my passion and my personal life? Am I indulging my tendency to stitch at the cost of others? Am I making the most of my time? I am so grateful to a husband who gladly agrees to take on parenting duties while I trot off to a whole day at a quilt show. Is he really just wonderful, or is he just "resigned to reality".
Surely, I'm not the only quilter who feels this pang of "am I doing the right thing" or "am I doing enough?" I don't think it's exclusive to quilters. Obviously, we all have different things in life to balance. I'm talking about the balance between feeding the soul creatively, and setting limits so that other areas of our life don't get swallowed up. Does that make sense? Where is the line between self-care and self-indulgence?
Hmm, maybe I should go stitch something while I think about it? :)
Enjoy every stitch!